What is virginity? How do I lose it? Can I bring it back?

Firstly, it’s good to understand some important words. Virginity is the way to describe a male or female before they have had sexual intercourse. A virgin is a person who has never had sexual intercourse, and both males and females can be virgins. The process of losing your virginity is when a male or female has sexual intercourse for the first time.

Before you have sexual intercourse for the first time, you might have experimented by kissing, hugging and touching your partner, but you are still a virgin until you have sexual intercourse for the first time.

You can only lose your virginity once as you cannot have your first sexual intercourse experience again.

Sometimes a female virgin will bleed a little when she has sexual intercourse for the first time. This is completely normal and nothing to worry about. It is also possible that a female virgin will NOT bleed when they have sexual intercourse for the first time. The bleeding is caused by the tearing of her hymen, which is a ring of thin skin that covers part of the opening of the vagina. It does not cover the vagina completely but has a small opening to allow menstrual blood to come out. The opening is normally the size of a finger. When having sexual intercourse the hymen will stretch and it can feel uncomfortable or a little painful. Sometimes, the hymen can tear or break if it stretches quickly, and this can cause some bleeding. But the pain and the bleeding might not happen if the female virgin is relaxed during sexual intercourse.

The hymen breaking and the bleeding are seen in some cultures as proof or evidence that the young woman was a virgin. But some female virgins do not bleed the first time they have sexual intercourse, because the hymen has already broken or torn which can happen naturally during sport or physical activities.

Having sexual intercourse for the first time is a big decision and you might be excited and nervous at the same time, and wonder whether it will hurt and if you or your partner will be able to do it correctly. When you decide to have sexual intercourse for the first time you might ask yourself, how will it be, will I like it, will I do it right?  Listen to each other, have respect for each other and don’t do anything you don’t want to do or the other person doesn’t want to do. If you do decide to have sexual intercourse, it is okay to stop and at any point ask your partner to stop, because nobody has the right to make you do anything you do not want to do.

The most important thing is for you and your partner to feel comfortable and give consent or permission to having sexual intercourse with each other. You shouldn’t feel pressured into it. You should also remember that the Royal Government of Cambodia has a law that says that people from the age of 15 years old can consent to having sexual intercourse.

It is also important to keep in mind that you or your partner can still get pregnant or get a Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) even if it is your first time having sexual intercourse. So, it is very important to use a condom.

You can call Child Helpline Cambodia anytime for free on 1280 if you would like to receive emotional support or further information on this subject.

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